How we met
The first time I ever really met Ali was way before I fell in love with her dad. I had seen her with Kris a couple of times but hadn't talked to her or anything. One day she came in to where her dad and I worked with her "Gmo." I tried talking to her and asked her questions like, "What's your name?" and "How old are you?" but she didn't say much; she was so shy! Then Gmo asked me if I had any kids of my own. I just laughed and said, "No way, not yet!" and then I remember looking at Ali and thinking about what it would be like if she were mine.
A few months later I fell in love with Kris. Up until that point I hadn't been around Ali very much because we didn't want to make things complicated in case things didn't work out. I went to his house one day during my lunch break and there she was, little miss Ali, running around the house in nothing but her panties! She wanted me to play with her so we went in to her bedroom and made up some crazy card game where we flipped the cards over as fast as we could. We only played for maybe 30 minutes and that was the longest I had ever been around her.
Instant connection
Soon Kris asked me to meet his family. I was a nervous wreck. What if they don't like me? What if they think I'm too young for him? We went to Santa Fe. I wore a black shirt that had white polka dots all over it. There were quite a few of us so we had to wait a little while before being seated, so we all sat there shelling peanuts and it was surprisingly not as awkward as you'd think! Ali had come with Sherry but as soon as we got there and sat down she walked over to me, climbed up in my lap, and asked me to help her with her peanuts. Everyone looked really shocked. It was unlike her to just gravitate and open up to someone like that, as Kris told me later. Ali spent the entire dinner sitting on my lap. After dinner Kris said, "I have never seen her do that before. She's usually so shy. She must really like you." Score!
She became very, very attached to me from that point on. Poor Kris... he had to take a back seat for a while. Everything was Dessstiny this and Dessstiny that (she always held the "s" on my name, it was so funny). Every single Sunday at church she sat on my lap the entire time. When we stood during the songs I held her. I remember sometimes wanting to put her down because my feet hurt so bad in my high heels, but I didn't want to ever let her go at the same time! So I'd stand there and hold her until we sat down again, every single time. Some people had no idea she wasn't really mine. They'd say, "Is this your daughter? She looks so much like you!" It was so funny.
Becoming a "family"
Kris asked me to marry him in June 2009. We told Ali we were all getting married and would be a family soon. I asked her to be my flower girl and she was so excited! I had a hunch she would end up being too shy to walk down the aisle by herself but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine carrying her! It was the only way we could get her down the aisle without her crying, but it couldn't have been more perfect. That one little act represents us so well: She loves and trusts me completely and I would do absolutely anything for her.
Four years later here we are. Our relationship is beyond what I could have ever imagined. She feels so comfortable with me, still wants me to hold her, still wants me to play with her, and still loves me the same. I can't even imagine our relationship being any stronger. I used to struggle with her not being "mine" but I think it has actually made us better. She isn't just my stepdaughter, she's one of my best friends! Just the other day we were talking and I told her that I could talk about almost anything with her. She said, "What can't you talk to me about, Destiny?" I told her that there's some grown-up stuff I didn't talk to her about because she wouldn't understand it or it would be too boring to talk about, like money. She said, "Des, you can talk to me about money anytime you want. I may not get it, but I'll still listen." She melts my heart! When I think about how different my life would have been had I not met Kris... I can't even fathom it. Everything has worked out so perfect and I know and believe with all my heart that this was all God's doing.
She's now seven. She's seven?? It's so hard to believe! We had her birthday party at Lazer Zone the weekend before her birthday and the kids had a blast! They each got like 20 tokens to use in the arcade, we had cookie cake, cupcakes, Dr Pepper, presents, and Ali and Kris played laser tag before we left. Talk about a successful birthday party!
Now let's take a stroll down memory lane... pictures of Ali starting from the time I met her until now:
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